Tag Archives: treatment

Happiness and Complacency

by admin Posted on January 20, 2012

Complacency is the poison to my happiness. It is only when I am not complacent that I get to happy. But once I arrive in happy, I lean back into complacency. Then, like clockwork, I find myself disgruntled, pissy, selfish. Continue reading →

Posted in Antidepressants, Depression, Emotional Sobriety, Fear, Fun, Help, My Story, Negativity, Relapse, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality, Suffering, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, antidepressants, attitude, change, chemical dependency, detox, drinking, fear, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, grief, Higher power, joy, love, negativity, pain, positive thinking, recovery, self medicating, self pity, self-care, self-talk, service, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse, treatment | 2 Comments

I Give Thanks For…

by admin Posted on November 23, 2011

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I didn’t grow up in one of those families that took turns around the table sharing platitudes of gratitude. In fact, gratitude, appreciation, thankfulness were not part of my thinking or vocabulary for most of my life. I could see no reason to be grateful. My parents died. I didn’t want to drink but I didn’t want to stop either. I felt sad and alone every waking moment. I failed my friends and family. I lived in my head and took interest only in selfish shit. I wished for death. Continue reading →

Posted in Emotional Sobriety, Family, Gratitude, Holidays, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, change, detox, drinking, family, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, Holidays, joy, love, pain, recovery, relationships, self medicating, self pity, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse, Thanksgiving, treatment, willingness | 4 Comments

Aren’t You Worried…?

by admin Posted on November 16, 2011

I can’t recall if I’ve shared the latest regarding my educational/professional endeavors. In a nutshell, I am putting my thesis on the shelf (for the time being) and am searching for a real, grown-up, full-time job. Eek! An unnamed individual recently asked me something like the following: Aren’t you worried prospective employers will Google and Facebook you and find your blog?
Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Fear, Help, Openness | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, chemical dependency, cirrhosis, dating, drinking, family, grateful, gratitude, recovery, relationships, service, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse, treatment, willingness | 2 Comments

Special Guest Post: Aren’t We ALL in Recovery?

by admin Posted on November 14, 2011

A few weeks ago, I asked Emma Wilhelm, dear friend and author of blogs Divorced Before 30 and Emmasota, to pen a guest post for my blog. Her own thoughts on addiction, alcoholism, recovery…how it has touched her life. As a non-alcoholic. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Conflict, Emotional Sobriety, Gratitude, Help, Self-Care, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, chemical dependency, drinking, grateful, gratitude, joy, loss, recovery, self-care, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, treatment | Leave a comment

Help Is Not A Four-Letter Word

by admin Posted on September 28, 2011

Help was four-letter word in my family. You simply did not ask for help. No. It was more along the lines of pull yourself up by your bootstraps. Figure it out. Get over it. Do something useful and quit moping. Help was synonymous with weak and weak with shame, stupidity, and uselessness. Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Gratitude, Help, Spirituality | Tagged attitude, change, detox, Higher power, negativity, positive thinking, recovery, self-care, self-talk, treatment, willingness | Leave a comment

Why Don’t You Just Stop?

by admin Posted on July 29, 2011

Self-awareness and knowledge may lead the heavy or problem drinker to quit. For the alcoholic, however, it rarely does the trick. Insight feeds the animal. It’s a vicious cycle: I drink. I hate myself. I feel ashamed. I drink more. I hate myself even more. I am consumed by shame… and so on. It doesn’t stop until we stop. In my experience, this doesn’t happen until we’ve had enough. Some people reach enough pretty quickly. For others, enough comes with death. Continue reading →

Posted in Relationships, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, change, chemical dependency, detox, drinking, God, Higher power, intervention, recovery, self medicating, self pity, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, treatment, willingness | 2 Comments

My Particular Brand of Crazy

by admin Posted on July 11, 2011

And now a break from our regularly scheduled programming (i.e. the continuation of my last post, Thank You (Part I)). Instead, tonight’s feature is a brief account of my current brain spinnings. A couple hours ago, I had the pleasure of hearing another recovering alcoholic speak. It made me consider how I show up up differently for others’ stories than I did 24 months ago. Continue reading →

Posted in Gratitude, My Story, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, chemical dependency, cirrhosis, drinking, fear, God, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, loss, recovery, relationships, self pity, self-care, service, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse, treatment | Leave a comment

Just Like Me

by admin Posted on July 2, 2011

I remember rows of uncomfortable metal chairs filled with strange, happy people. Watery coffee. The stench of stale cigarette smoke. I spent a great deal of time differentiating myself, as if making the distance would disprove my reason for being there in the first place. I am an alcoholic. But I wasn’t like that guy over there! He was rough; a gigantic biker fit with the leather get-up. That lady in front of me? I looked nothing like her, with her purple hair and ink sleeves. Down the line I went, checking people out. Until I spotted a couple who looked, well, just like me. The woman and I even wore the same shirt. I widened my gaze and took in all of the meeting goers. Wouldn’t you know, most of them looked just like me. Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Fear, Gratitude, Socializing, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, chemical dependency, drinking, family, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, love, mindfulness, pain, recovery, relationships, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, treatment, willingness | Leave a comment

You Have Fun in Recovery? Really?

by admin Posted on June 1, 2011

When I first began this sober journey, people would often tell me that I would have more fun in recovery than I’d ever had before. Boy did I scoff at that sentiment. And if I had a dollar for every time I heard “My worst day sober is better than my best day drunk,” I’d be in Diet Coke for weeks (and I drink a shit ton of that stuff). Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Fun, Gratitude, Music, Parties, Relationships, Socializing, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, change, chemical dependency, dating, drinking, family, fun, grateful, gratitude, joy, laughter, love, mindfulness, music, relationships, service, sobriety, treatment, willingness | 4 Comments

Is Sobriety Boring?

by admin Posted on May 26, 2011

I recently celebrated my sober birthday. Two years. Who would have thunk it? Certainly not me. I equated life without booze with the doldrums. Utter boredom. Monotony. No friends. The absence of fun and excitement. Just the same thing day after day after day. I never anticipated I would stay sober for over two years. Hell no. Continue reading →

Posted in Fun, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Negativity, Patience, Socializing, Spirituality, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, chemical dependency, dating, detox, drinking, fear, gratitude, mindfulness, negativity, pain, positive thinking, recovery, self pity, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, treatment | 5 Comments