Tag Archives: relationships

Too Much Loss

by admin Posted on May 16, 2013

If you’ve read my blog recently, you know I had to put my beloved Golden Retriever to sleep. She had been sick off and on for months. We tried medications, tests, etc. but when she was bleeding out of nose … Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Happiness, Self-Care, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, breakup, change, chemical dependency, cirrhosis, drinking, family, God, grief, heart ache, Higher power, loss, love, negativity, pain, recovery, relationships, self medicating, self pity, service, sobriety, story | 2 Comments

“Circumstances Make Us Willing”

by admin Posted on May 15, 2013

My old sponsor and I used to meet for walk and talks. She had much wisdom to impart upon me. And for a time, I listened. And I was happy. Then I put on ear muffs and stopped hearing. I … Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Conflict, Emotional Sobriety, Gratitude, Happiness, Self-Care, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, grief, negativity, pain, pause, recovery, relationships, self pity, sobriety, willingness | Leave a comment

Moving Out; Moving In; Moving On

by admin Posted on May 12, 2013

Yesterday was May 11. That is significant for two reasons: 1) It was my sober date; and 2) It was my relapse date. Last year, after three years of recovery, I relapsed. On my sober date. It was at a … Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Emotional Sobriety, Parties, Regret, Relapse, Self-Care, shame, Socializing, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, change, chemical dependency, drinking, loss, love, negativity, pain, relationships, self medicating, self pity, self-care, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse | 4 Comments

The List, Part I

by admin Posted on January 29, 2013

My sponsor told me months ago that I needed to make a list. A list of all the things I am powerless over. I haven’t made that list. I think it’s time. I don’t know how to do this, this life thing. I am not doing this life thing well at all. But change, it’s too big, daunting. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Emotional Sobriety, Expectation, Family, Fear, My Story, Regret, Relapse, Relationships, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, change, chemical dependency, drinking, family, fear, heart ache, negativity, recovery, relationships, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse | Leave a comment

Gratitude, On the Fly

by admin Posted on December 16, 2012

As I rocked back and forth in a cozy, enveloping recliner this morning, surrounded by other alcoholics and addicts, I felt something that’s been missing — gratitude. It filled my mind, my heart, my soul, my body. It formed an impenetrable, pink bubble about me. I was enshrouded in love. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Emotional Sobriety, Family, Gratitude, Holidays, Mindfulness, Service, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, attitude, chemical dependency, family, grateful, gratitude, love, mindfulness, recovery, relationships, self-care, substance abuse, willingness | Leave a comment

Waiting Tables Reminds Me A Lot of Life

by admin Posted on May 20, 2012

A few weeks ago, I left the coffee shop gig for a position serving at a local cafe. In many ways, a major quality of life improvement: better hours, higher pay, and a more diverse and challenging work experience. I continue to teach at a local University as well. I had grand plans of picking up my thesis, pounding it out by the end of summer. Now I recognize the craziness of that plan. As it is today, “just” working, I have little time for play. And that bums me out. Regardless, it’s not all for naught. I am always learning. Today has been a series of reflections on what I’m learning (or re-learning) about life, from waiting tables. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Emotional Sobriety, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Negativity, Self-Care, Service, Spirituality | Tagged attitude, mindfulness, positive thinking, relationships, willingness | Leave a comment

Temper, Temper

by admin Posted on May 1, 2012

I am mad. Not pissy. Not grouchy. Not even crabby. Mad. Not mad as in mad about kittens. Or mad as in crazy (although I do dabble in that from time to time). No. I am raising my voice, shaking “fists of rage” (as my awesome sister would say) mad. Continue reading →

Posted in Conflict, Emotional Sobriety, Mindfulness, Negativity, Problem Solving, Relationships, Spirituality | Tagged anger, attitude, mindfulness, relationships, spirituality, willingness | Leave a comment

That’s When He Will Start to Feel Better

by admin Posted on March 23, 2012

When I first sobered up, I was told several things that I had a hard time grasping: 1) It will be okay. Everything will be okay; 2) Letting go makes everything easier; and 3) Service work helps. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Conflict, Depression, Emotional Sobriety, Family, Fear, Mental Illness, Negativity, Openness, Relationships, Socializing, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, chemical dependency, family, fear, grateful, gratitude, joy, loss, love, positive thinking, recovery, relationships, self medicating, self pity, service, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, willingness | 2 Comments

Gratitude Abound

by admin Posted on March 20, 2012

I haven’t blogged in about two weeks and it’s been nagging me… I have wanted to write, that’s for sure, however I have been either one or some combination of the following for over a week: 1) exhausted and sleep-deprived (damn insomnia and a new sleep schedule); 2) in intense pain (f’ing abscess); 3) working; 4) watching Downton Abbey; and 5) hanging with my peeps. Continue reading →

Posted in Emotional Sobriety, Family, Gratitude, Insomnia, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged appreciation, attitude, change, family, grateful, gratitude, joy, love, relationships, sobriety, spirituality, story | 1 Comment

Detaching with Love

by admin Posted on February 27, 2012

I’ve had the opportunity to have many conversations about that alien creature– detachment– over the past few days. I believe that in their very nature, relationships between humans fall on some spectrum of attachment. But attachment can give way to pathology, codependence, and a whole host of gnarly harms… How and when does this happen? Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Conflict, Emotional Sobriety, Family, Fear, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attachment, attitude, Buddhism, change, chemical dependency, detachment, family, fear, God, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, joy, loss, love, mindfulness, pain, recovery, relationships, self-care, spirituality, substance abuse, willingness | Leave a comment