Tag Archives: fun

Finding Gratitude In Garbage

by admin Posted on August 13, 2012

While listening to others in recovery talk Friday night, I was reminded that I need to actively participate in creating joy in my life. That there will always be times that are less than. Less than fun. Less than ideal. Less than happy. And of course, less than perfect. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Conflict, Emotional Sobriety, Fear, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, change, chemical dependency, drinking, fear, fun, grateful, gratitude, joy, love, mindfulness, pain, recovery, self pity, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, willingness | Leave a comment

Addiction: The Disease that Hi(gh)jacks the Brain

by admin Posted on July 12, 2012

As I drove home from an early-morning meeting today, I realized something major. I was thinking about NOTHING. For those of you who haven’t had the exquisite pain and pleasure of experiencing addiction, this probably sounds quite silly. Or negative. For someone like me, with a diseased, addicted brain, it’s absolutely wonderful and miraculous. Continue reading →

Posted in Gratitude, Mental Illness, Mindfulness, Relapse, Self-Care, Spirituality, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, attitude, change, chemical dependency, drinking, fun, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, joy, mindfulness, recovery, self-care, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, willingness | Leave a comment

Happiness and Complacency

by admin Posted on January 20, 2012

Complacency is the poison to my happiness. It is only when I am not complacent that I get to happy. But once I arrive in happy, I lean back into complacency. Then, like clockwork, I find myself disgruntled, pissy, selfish. Continue reading →

Posted in Antidepressants, Depression, Emotional Sobriety, Fear, Fun, Help, My Story, Negativity, Relapse, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality, Suffering, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, antidepressants, attitude, change, chemical dependency, detox, drinking, fear, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, grief, Higher power, joy, love, negativity, pain, positive thinking, recovery, self medicating, self pity, self-care, self-talk, service, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse, treatment | 2 Comments

Gray Matter

by admin Posted on January 8, 2012

It took months, years, of recovery, therapy, and dialectical behavior therapy before I could begin withstanding the grayness in everything and everyone. I still struggle with it. It is far easier for me to dismiss people or places as being awful and unworthy than to acknowledge the humanity, the flaws in absolutely all that exists. Because to recognize others’ flaws is to concede to my own. Which can be ugly. Or enlightening. Depending on the life lens. I filtered everything through the ugly lens for 32 years. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Emotional Sobriety, Expectation, Fun, Openness, Self-Care, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, change, fun, philosophy, recovery, sobriety, spirituality, willingness | Leave a comment

Taking Stock of 2011

by admin Posted on December 28, 2011

2011 has been a remarkable year. I have stayed sober. At times by the hair of my chinny-chin-chin. I have worked an altogether imperfect, incomplete program in recovery. I’ve joined a wonderful family. I have taken some professional risks. I have begun to release my white-knuckle grip on old stories and let new narratives take root. Continue reading →

Posted in Conflict, Emotional Sobriety, Family, Fear, Gratitude, Holidays, Regret, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, breakup, change, chemical dependency, dating, drinking, family, fear, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, recovery, relationships, self-care, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse | Leave a comment

Tomorrow Will Be Kinder

by admin Posted on December 2, 2011

When I first sobered up, I avoided concerts, clubs, and bars. As such, I heard little live music. Which bummed me out. I missed it. But I wasn’t so sure I’d have fun. Early recovery was a lesson in all things Andrea. A long process of relearning and claiming what is it that I actually enjoy doing. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Emotional Sobriety, Gratitude, Socializing, Spirituality, Suffering | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, change, chemical dependency, concerts, drinking, fun, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, joy, love, mindfulness, music, negativity, positive thinking, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, willingness | Leave a comment

I Give Thanks For…

by admin Posted on November 23, 2011

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. I didn’t grow up in one of those families that took turns around the table sharing platitudes of gratitude. In fact, gratitude, appreciation, thankfulness were not part of my thinking or vocabulary for most of my life. I could see no reason to be grateful. My parents died. I didn’t want to drink but I didn’t want to stop either. I felt sad and alone every waking moment. I failed my friends and family. I lived in my head and took interest only in selfish shit. I wished for death. Continue reading →

Posted in Emotional Sobriety, Family, Gratitude, Holidays, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, change, detox, drinking, family, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, Holidays, joy, love, pain, recovery, relationships, self medicating, self pity, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse, Thanksgiving, treatment, willingness | 4 Comments

You Make Cakes; You Don’t Make Pizzas!

by admin Posted on November 22, 2011

For 21 years I lived life pretty conventionally. To the outside observer that is. I was a good student. I played field hockey. I joined a youth symphony orchestra. I ate my peas and carrots. Then one month before my 22nd birthday, my father died. It rocked my world. The past 13 years have taken me some weird, frightening, exhilarating, trippy places and directions. Franky, I adore the idiosyncrasies of a life fully lived. Call it serendipity, chance, fate, luck, a higher power– that’s semantics– there has got to be something WAY bigger than puny ole me calling the shots. It’s the only satisfying explanation I have for being offered a new career opportunity. Continue reading →

Posted in Gratitude, Openness, Regret, Spirituality, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, change, chemical dependency, drinking, fear, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, Higher power, positive thinking, recovery, self pity, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, story, willingness | 2 Comments

Well I’m Movin’ On Up

by admin Posted on November 1, 2011

Dear readers, I am moving! And to the East side! The East side of the Twin Cities, that is. Yes, I am leaving my increasingly hipster Uptown Minneapolis neighborhood for the more residential, comparatively bucolic St. Paul scene. Continue reading →

Posted in Conflict, Family, Fear, Fun, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Music, Patience, Problem Solving, Relationships, Self-Care, Uncategorized | Tagged attitude, change, dating, family, fear, fun, gratitude, joy, love, music, positive thinking, relationships, self-care, story | Leave a comment

Happy Birthday To Me

by admin Posted on September 24, 2011

Today is my birthday. I am 34. That means I am in my mid-thirties. Is it wrong that I am (no longer secretly) thrilled people often mistake me for being in my twenties? I gotta tell you that although I am trying, I am not particularly joyous today. Gratitude and love have been muddled with a little resentment and sadness. Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Fear, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Negativity, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality, Uncategorized | Tagged alcoholism, appreciation, change, drinking, family, fear, fun, grateful, gratitude, grief, joy, loss, love, negativity, pain, positive thinking, recovery, relationships, self pity, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse | 3 Comments