Category Archives: Fun

Happiness and Complacency

by admin Posted on January 20, 2012

Complacency is the poison to my happiness. It is only when I am not complacent that I get to happy. But once I arrive in happy, I lean back into complacency. Then, like clockwork, I find myself disgruntled, pissy, selfish. Continue reading →

Posted in Antidepressants, Depression, Emotional Sobriety, Fear, Fun, Help, My Story, Negativity, Relapse, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality, Suffering, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, antidepressants, attitude, change, chemical dependency, detox, drinking, fear, fun, God, grateful, gratitude, grief, Higher power, joy, love, negativity, pain, positive thinking, recovery, self medicating, self pity, self-care, self-talk, service, sobriety, spirituality, story, substance abuse, treatment | 2 Comments

Good Feet

by admin Posted on January 17, 2012

I awoke this morning with a start. Oh crap. I need to get out of bed. Shit. I really, really don’t want to deal. Then I laughed. I mean, what a terribly unhappy and counter-productive way to start the day! Continue reading →

Posted in Emotional Sobriety, Family, Fun, Gratitude, Openness, Relationships, Self-Care, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, change, chemical dependency, drinking, family, joy, mindfulness, music, positive thinking, recovery, relationships, self pity, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, willingness | Leave a comment

Gray Matter

by admin Posted on January 8, 2012

It took months, years, of recovery, therapy, and dialectical behavior therapy before I could begin withstanding the grayness in everything and everyone. I still struggle with it. It is far easier for me to dismiss people or places as being awful and unworthy than to acknowledge the humanity, the flaws in absolutely all that exists. Because to recognize others’ flaws is to concede to my own. Which can be ugly. Or enlightening. Depending on the life lens. I filtered everything through the ugly lens for 32 years. Continue reading →

Posted in Acceptance, Emotional Sobriety, Expectation, Fun, Openness, Self-Care, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, change, fun, philosophy, recovery, sobriety, spirituality, willingness | Leave a comment

Holiday. Celebrate.

by admin Posted on November 18, 2011

I spent 10 years absolutely dreading and abhorring November 1 through January 2. During those months, I would feel the loss of my family times a thousand. Everything– the music, the rituals, neighborly cheer, decorations, even family strife– drove home one singular idea– I was all alone. When my nephew was born, bless his adorable and huge heart, I began to soften. I let in a miniscule inkling of merriment. Yet I continued to drink. Hide. Numb out. Until I got desperate and sick enough to get dry. Luckily I had about seven months before my first sober holiday season. It was interesting. Painful. Weird. Continue reading →

Posted in Depression, Emotional Sobriety, Family, Fun, Gratitude, Holidays, Parties, Relationships, Socializing, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, change, chemical dependency, Christmas, drinking, family, Gifts, grateful, gratitude, grief, heart ache, Holidays, joy, love, Merriment, service, Shopping, sobriety, spirituality, story, Stress, substance abuse, Thanksgiving | Leave a comment

Well I’m Movin’ On Up

by admin Posted on November 1, 2011

Dear readers, I am moving! And to the East side! The East side of the Twin Cities, that is. Yes, I am leaving my increasingly hipster Uptown Minneapolis neighborhood for the more residential, comparatively bucolic St. Paul scene. Continue reading →

Posted in Conflict, Family, Fear, Fun, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Music, Patience, Problem Solving, Relationships, Self-Care, Uncategorized | Tagged attitude, change, dating, family, fear, fun, gratitude, joy, love, music, positive thinking, relationships, self-care, story | Leave a comment

Practicing Pausing

by admin Posted on June 24, 2011

Chillaxin’ doesn’t come naturally to me. The ability to endure a state of being not involving drama, endless goals, project upon project, and some kind of seemingly insane self-improvement is still, after over two years, unfamiliar and at times uncomfortable. I am an alcoholic. Quiet is a foreign language. Continue reading →

Posted in Fun, Mindfulness, Self-Care, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, break, change, chemical dependency, chillaxin', drinking, fun, mindfulness, pause, recovery, relationships, self-care, sobriety, spirituality, willingness | 2 Comments

“End-of-Fun-Time” Blues

by admin Posted on June 13, 2011

You see, ever since I was a small child, I have been afflicted with the “end-of-fun-time blues.” In other words, when I know that an experience, weekend, trip, etc., is about to conclude and life will begin to seep back in, I get pissy. This isn’t an altogether uncommon phenomenon; it’s the human condition. We cling to experiences, feelings, opinions, judgments, and ideas, just as we covet material possessions. Don’t we all get a little bummed at the “end-of-fun-time”? Continue reading →

Posted in Fun, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Relationships, Socializing, Spirituality | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, attitude, chemical dependency, dating, family, fun, grateful, gratitude, love, mindfulness, music, negativity, recovery, relationships, sobriety, spirituality, willingness | Leave a comment

You Have Fun in Recovery? Really?

by admin Posted on June 1, 2011

When I first began this sober journey, people would often tell me that I would have more fun in recovery than I’d ever had before. Boy did I scoff at that sentiment. And if I had a dollar for every time I heard “My worst day sober is better than my best day drunk,” I’d be in Diet Coke for weeks (and I drink a shit ton of that stuff). Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Fun, Gratitude, Music, Parties, Relationships, Socializing, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, attitude, change, chemical dependency, dating, drinking, family, fun, grateful, gratitude, joy, laughter, love, mindfulness, music, relationships, service, sobriety, treatment, willingness | 4 Comments

Is Sobriety Boring?

by admin Posted on May 26, 2011

I recently celebrated my sober birthday. Two years. Who would have thunk it? Certainly not me. I equated life without booze with the doldrums. Utter boredom. Monotony. No friends. The absence of fun and excitement. Just the same thing day after day after day. I never anticipated I would stay sober for over two years. Hell no. Continue reading →

Posted in Fun, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Negativity, Patience, Socializing, Spirituality, Uncategorized | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, appreciation, chemical dependency, dating, detox, drinking, fear, gratitude, mindfulness, negativity, pain, positive thinking, recovery, self pity, self-talk, sobriety, spirituality, substance abuse, treatment | 5 Comments

Party On and Tunes for Cinco de Mayo 2011

by admin Posted on May 5, 2011

Stevie Wonder, freshly brewed java, and a peppering of Cinco de Mayo 2000 flashbacks accompanied me on my commute this morning. Nothing out of the ordinary, really, just waterfalls of tequila and sangria followed by a fight with my friend’s boyfriend. Continue reading →

Posted in Fear, Fun, Music, Parties, Socializing | Tagged addiction, alcoholism, change, drinking, fear, fun, grateful, gratitude, music, recovery, sobriety, story, substance abuse | Leave a comment